After two very intensive weeks, today I our last day. Everybody is very tired especially because of the final presentations.
Some questions to be answered today:
1. What was the strongest moment/experience in Riga (flat, street, studio)
2. What to take further in the working residence in October in Bucharest
3. Positive and negative aspects of the residence
4. Is the [Fragile] team ready to move on the next phase.
5. What kind of performance will be [Fragile]
We met in the afternoon in the the dance studio and we start our day of evaluation and reflections.

Unfortunately, Natalia will need to leave the team, I feel she is not ready for this project.

Our last hour, I go together with Giselda and Cristian to the lovely tea-spot in the garden of Riga. We speak and brainstorm about possibilities. Questions still…
How to dare more
How to push our/audience limits
How to get into people’s fragility and stories
What is the wild Cristian and Giselda
How to hijack the performance
What is our fragility
Who’s gonne me the third performer in the piece

Final photo in Riga. Bye bye Riga, we had a very rich time.

July 10

Today I’m Natalia and I have two tasks. Climb the stairs in the living room in different ways and sing the Polish anthems. And make a travelling map.

First, I’m kissing on a body scar. Than I’m entering in Natalia’s room and I found the book of Nietzche from the Chomsky’s bar. I start reading it…

“Saying yes to life even on its strangest and most painful episodes, the will of life rejoining in its own in exhausting vitality even as it witness the destruction of its greatest heroes – that’s why I called Dionisyan, that’s what I guessed to be the bridge to the psychology of the tragic poet” (Nietzche – The twilight of Idols)

Shortly we start to work. I decide to play the crazy Natalia, compusilve with lots of sexual desire. I remember her saying “I Can Manage Everything”. I can be Natalia. Funny enough the Natalia Cosmin is leading the rehearsal today.
I START MY NEW IDENTITY WITH A KISS ON THE SCAR.
I TAPE MY BODY AND PERFORM WITH THE SWIMING HAT.
I WANT TO BE PART OF CRISTIAN’S MASTERPIECE
I WANT TO KISS IN THE MASTERPIECE
I WAS 40 % Cosmin while I was performing and 60 % Natalia.

After the rehearsals I dress-up as Natalia for the dinner.
And after the dinner, shortly I come back alone, I fall asleep in her sofa (without even not opening it) while thinking to the day…I supposed it’s hard to be Natalia.

I wake-up in the morning and I found my shoes at the entrance of the room. I don’t understand whom I am Natalia or Cosmin ? I realised that today we need to run together today before changing back to our identity. And than shout out being naked for minute our passed identity. I start hearing in the others room Cristian and Giselda screaming. I start screaming NATALIAAAAAAAAAAA…I’m also documenting the scream. End of identity.

July 8/2014

First change of identity today. Full swap between us with costume, laptops, rooms. And few rules: who is taking the identity of Cosmin need to led the daily rehearsal as well as to answer to the professional emails received in his laptop . Who’s gonna be Giselda need to take care of the calories and need to do an emotional check-up before going to sleep.Who is gone be Cristian need to do joggining in the morning, who’s gonna be Natalia need to sing the Polish anthems…And than we choose. Cosmin is Giselda, Cristian is Cosmin, Natalia is Cristian, Giselda is Natalia.

18.56
Today I’m Giselda. I’m naked on the floor with the notebook. My heart is beating up very strong, what a crazy idea to work on. I’m thinking of the heart installation of Christian Boltanski in Japan (http://www.benesse-artsite.jp/en/boltanski/index.html).But I’m not sure that is Giselda’s thinking…
I love the time of transformation in somebody else. All of of us standing naked next to each other. After a while we enter the new rooms who will be our home for the next 24 hours. I dressed up in Giselda’s swimming costume, looks we are the same size :). I think that the day will be crazy, what a crazy idea Cosmin had…
For tonight I need to be careful with the dinner, I’m allowed only 1000 calories.

24.00
This evening I discovered new things about my new identity. I love Giselda’s eye glasses, the lipstick and the metal necklace. I like my new look. We went our for the dinner in the new identities, people are looking strange to us. We are foreigners for sure…Beautifull view of Riga from the top terrase. I’m reading the menu, finally I decide to take a salad, a beer and some oysters (definitively not very Giselda’s style). Back in the room I’m calculating the calories, it was approximatively 800 calories (110 oysters, 350 the salad, 140 the small beer, 100 olive oil, olives, beetroot, beans). We also had a very difficult discussion, Cosmin’s opens up a discussion about the workshop-audition in Riga. Why did he choose Natalia ?
Before going to sleep I need to do an emotional check-up of the day. Another rule of Giselda’s life. Before falling a sleep, I receive an email from Cosmin.

“Hello everybody,
The ritual for tomorrow: at 10.40 we will let all the things in the rooms and we gonna go naked directly in our real rooms where we goons stay with ourselves until 11.00 when we will meet for the one hour discussion before the other new identity.
Sleep well,
Cosmin”

10.00
I slept much better in Giselda’s room and body. I just wake up in the first 15 minutes a lots of ideas for today’s rehearsals comes in my mind such as:
– to use the word identity in our game;
– to develop some clear caracthers from the book “Alice in wonderland” – maybe I can work on the Rubbit
– to invite some guests from Riga to experience as with the new identities
– to create short solos to be watched on the phone (like Giselda’s transparent solo)
Before leaving the room I thanks to Giselda.

Riga